How to Cope with Failure and Frustration

Failure is defeat and the opposite of success. Everyday, we are likely to experience failures of various degrees, some very insignificant but some others major. We constantly attempt to do or achieve something as part of our daily lives. We are happy and elated when we succeed, but depressed and downcast when we fail. Most of us may be able to somehow cope with the day-to-day minor failures rather easily at least with a little patience and effort. We may tend to forget them quite easily. However, they can hurt and we may need reinforcements to help overcome and cope with these failures and frustrations.

When some major devastating failure strikes you, you have to deal with the experience. A feeling of incompetence may wash over you. You lose your self-confidence. Your self-esteem plunges to an unfathomable low. Life suddenly loses its verve and enthusiasm. You feel weak and helpless, as your situation appears very hopeless. You may think that your very survival is worthless. Some people get so depressed due to their failure that they may go to the extent of giving up their lives.

Therefore, you have to learn to cope with failures, whether small or big. One of the things you can do in this regard is to anticipate failure as a possible outcome, notwithstanding your best efforts for success. Realize that failures are an unpleasant fact. Be prepared to accept them, without being overwhelmed by them in a negative way. While you do your best for success, you should remember that in a world of competition, your best efforts may fall short in rewarding you with the desired outcome.

Learn to look at them as occasions that provide an opportunity for improvement and analysis. Remember, they can really work for your future success, if you care to learn the lessons they teach. Treat failures as passing phases of your life, maybe essential phases that help you in modifying your subsequent actions that might lead you on to a more satisfying and successful path later on.

One must realize that any learning situation is fraught with frequent and even repeated failures, which unfortunately result in creating a sense of frustration. Children have to be made aware of the fact that failures are only an indication that they have attempted to exceed themselves in the process of their learning and that they are sure signs that they are indeed learning properly. This way the effects of frustration due to repeated failures will not be damaging. They will then take failures in their stride.

Accept responsibility for your failure. Searching for a scapegoat and blaming an external factor or another person for your failure will not reduce your pain in any way. It only betrays a weakness of the mind and a lack of appreciation of the limits of your own abilities. If you accept that nobody else need be blamed for your failure, you can actually strive better in future and even taste success because of your heightened effort.

Learn to cope with failure with the same sense of humility that should mark your success. Sometimes, you may need external support to help you deal with your failures and frustrations. Seek it. Learn to face failures with courage and without wilting under the stress of frustration that they cause.